Lesson from a Crocheted Scarf...

In an attempt to avoid doing anything remotely productive yesterday morning, I sat on the sofa wrapped in a snuggly comforter, a large mug of hot chocolate on the end-table, and kitty Liebe sitting dutifully by my side, happy to help tangle my yarn at any given moment. Several weeks ago I began an attempt at a crocheted scarf for myself, but with moving and all, just really hadn't had time to work on it much. Trying to avoid packing, laundry and doing dishes, was the perfect excuse to pick the project up again.

As I was working on the scarf, I realized pretty quickly that I was not likely going to have enough yarn to make anything close to functional ie- it would have been VERY short. I also realized that it seemed very wide- what was I thinking when I first started it.... hmmm!! I knew that if I started over, making it a bit less wide, I'd be able to make a scarf that was functional and beautiful. So, I began the "painful" process of unraveling what I'd begun... tearing it apart.

This is where God spoke to me. He showed me that my life was similar to that scarf. What I'd begun just wasn't working out so well and He needed to help me start over. So, similar to the tearing apart of the scarf, He needed to, in essence, tear apart my life to make it functional and beautiful. The last few months have been horribly painful, and I know that the pain is not likely over. I haven't even begun to deal with my grief/loss yet, and I know that will be a time filled with many tears. But I also know that God wants to re-make me. He will provide the healing, the right people to support me, and the direction that He wants me to head. God knows the "big picture" here. I am (most of the time) content with knowing that He can see what I am not able to. So, if He feels that perhaps some "tearing apart" is necessary to make something more beautiful and functional, then I'm ok with that.

I was able to complete the "tearing apart" and "re-making" of my scarf yesterday. It did turn our beautiful-- just like my life will. Every time I look at the scarf, I will be reminded of God's love for me- that He loves me SO much, that He knew I had to be "torn apart" to be made new. Thank you God!!

Happy New Year, everyone!! 2010 looks to be the BEST year ever!!