prayer please

If there is anyone out there in blog land- I am in huge need of prayer right now.... my financial problems have caught up with me and things are just not good right now... I'm an absolute mess- and never been so scared in all my life!

I was able to get an emergency appointment with Fr Nigel tomorrow (he's not in the office today, but I so wish he were)- talked with one of his staff who prayed with me over the phone- thank you God for Sandra!

I don't want to loose faith-- but right now, I am... and just cant pray. It's not that I don't believe that God loves me- I know He does- He just seems VERY far away right now.

Thanks for the prayers.... they're appreciated!

The Simple Woman's Daybook

For Today...


Outside my window... bright sunny day- temp near 70ish, I think... storms on the way (so what else is new)


I am thinking... that I hope my laundry dries on the clothesline before the storms hit- not promising though


From the kitchen... tuna/white bean/ basil tortilla wraps later for DD and I for dinner (that is unless he gets stuck in an emergency at work)


I am wearing... khaki shorts, red shirt, barefoot


I am reading... (about to read) the summer edition of Philo Trust Magazine (by Christian evangelist J John).... these usually have an awesome message- can't wait to sit back and read it


I am hoping... a solid, un-interrupted nights sleep tonight- I'm tired today


I am creating... not much today, but did do a painting yesterday


I am praying... for a friend whose cat is very sick- that if God must take little Muffins life- He do so quickly and peacefully and that my friend finds acceptance and peace.......for my little hero Ben that this chemo works and that he enjoys his day as bat boy with the Red Sox on Friday...... for a friend from CTK who has some serious mental issues- that she can find the help and healing that she needs....... for Fr Nigel's missing pet turtle- that he be found safely (don't laugh- someone apparently stole Mr Turtle from his office over the weekend- how sick is that... stealing a priest's pet turtle- talk about a need for healing!)...... oh... and that I find a job- like soon!


One of my favorite things... warm, sunny days sitting by the pond at CTK- enjoying the peace and quiet, the friendly visitors, the numerous critters (never know what you'll see there) and the unbelievable presence of Christ

A few plans for the rest of the week... healing service tomorrow- but beyond that, no clue- except for as always, spending time with my wonderful and loving God


Here is a picture thought I am sharing with you...

goats are such friendly creatures... (yes, this is me at CTK )

**to join in the fun and read other Daybooks... go to Grandma Wren's

Friday's Fave Five

Oh my gosh, what a week this has been!! Except for my microwave making a "grand exit", (read: spewing smoke and nasty fumes all through my house), it's been a fantastic week!! Here are a few highlights...

1. Can I take a minute (maybe more than one) to brag about my church??? God has blessed me with the most incredible church and church family in the entire world!! After being in and out of many denominations throughout my life (born and raised Methodist, a couple years in the Catholic church, a couple Sunday's in a "Community" church and a few visits to a "non denominational" church-- etc... you get the picture) I was beginning to feel that I didn't really "fit" anywhere.... but then, when I was going through a bit of a dark time in my life, DD told me about Christ the King Spiritual Life Center (a ministry of the Episcopal Diocese of Albany). He knew I was going through some "stuff" in my life, and thought that attending one of their healing services might be helpful. So... one fateful Tuesday I made the 45 minute trek up to Greenwich to attend the weekly healing service... can I tell you-- my life was never the same!! As I was sitting in their beautiful chapel, with about 100 others- worshiping God in song and word, hearing Scripture, praying and praying and praying (my first experience with "laying on of hands") the first thought that came to my mind was, "oh my gosh- these people "get it"...". For the first time in my life I felt like I fit in! Several weeks later, when meeting with Fr Nigel, director of the healing ministry, for prayer and counseling, for the first time in my life, I felt totally and completely understood!! CTK is Holy Ground... you feel it the moment you arrive on site- the presence of God is palpable- not only in word, but also in the eyes, hands, compassion of everyone there... yes, the people-- gosh, what can I say about the people... they're so special... you feel like family from your first moment there- there is SUCH love- God's love! Three years after arriving there for the first time- I'm in the process of preparing for Confirmation in the Episcopal church, and have begun the discernment process of possibly becoming a Deacon. Thank you God for leading me to this wonderful place!! Ok... so enough bragging... thanks for letting me share... so tell me about YOUR church now!!

2. I'm one of those with a stupid nut allergy... not only peanuts, but all nuts-- it's realllllly annoying!! But I've discovered Sunflower Seed Butter- which is a really great alternative and SO good! (It's a bit pricey, but will go on sale occasionally) I love eating it any way, but am prone to sit here at my desk and dip crackers right in the jar. YUM!!!!

3. While I'm on the topic of food... sort of... I dug out my sun tea jar this week. It's been quite a while since I've made sun tea, and had forgotten how good it was... throw some sugar, and a little lemon kool-aid in and I'm a happy lady. My aunt used to make it with frozen lemonade (that was SO good!), but I cant afford that right now- maybe sometime, but I'm content with the kool-aid for now.

4. I love having long conversations with friends, or anyone, about what a wonderful God we have!! I consider it a blessing to be able to share about all the wonderful things God has done in my life!!! Several times this week, God has put people in my path that need to hear my story of how God has healed me- in many, many ways. What an honor it is, to spread His message of healing!

5. I've been invited to attend a Woman's Cursillo weekend in November. I hear that this is a life changing event. For some reason, that alone is daunting... but at the same time, I'm really excited about the possibilities of spiritual growth and fellowship. If you've had a Cursillo experience, I'd love to hear about it!

Happy Friday everyone... (late post, sorry!) Enjoy your weekend!!!

The Simple Woman's Daybook

For Today...

Outside my window... cloudy and cool, light rain at the moment- supposed to warm up into the 70's later and maybe some sun

I am thinking... about what a great day DD and I had on Saturday... just hanging out at his house for the day- almost like we were married-- snuggled a lot, argued a bit, made up a bit, did some laundry and work around the house... I think I could get used to this!! (Now, if he'll get the hint and propose!)

I am thankful for... Fr Nigel's return after almost a month of traveling (for healing missions/ conferences) to England, Sweden, England (again), diocese convention in Speculator (NY), Colorado and Maine... gosh I missed him! I vaguely remember hugging him after church yesterday and telling him he was gone for too long... LOL...

From the kitchen... fresh radishes from DD's garden- mine still wont grow for some reason

I am wearing... shorts and a sweater, barefoot

I am reading... more cook books- I do so miss cooking

I am hoping... to find a way to fund a weekend retreat that I REALLY want to get to in July... led by Fr Nigel and Bishop Bill on "Healing of Memories"- did the same retreat two years ago on the topic of Forgiveness... it was life changing... expect this one will be too- just need to find a way to make it happen... please God!?

I am creating... a dream- a plan

I am praying... for my little hero Ben- this cancer just wont let up... was supposed to start a new chemo last week- praying that this one works. On a lighter note though, on July 3rd, he'll be on the field with the Red Sox as a bat boy for their game... how cool is this! I'm SO excited for him!

Around the house... so much to do, so little energy to do it with (didn't I say that last week too?... eek!)

One of my favorite things... hoping to start crocheting a prayer shawl this week- looking forward to a rainy day (yes, I love those) to just sit on my back porch, listen to the rain and crochet and pray all day

A few plans for the rest of the week... tomorrow the usual Tuesday healing service at CTK, weeding, trying to put up some sort of fencing around the garden to keep the cute critters from eating it all, hopefully spending a day with DD and as always, spending time with my wonderful and loving God

Here is a picture thought I am sharing with you...

~my favorite place in the world~

Friday's Fave Five

It's been an interesting week- (much better than last week) and there is a lot that stands out as being significant, as far as "a favorite part"...

1. God taught me a huge lesson in tithing this week. With being unemployed (still), the funds are hard to come by, and usually only appear through the goodness of DD or friends, and when they do, I try to manage them with an iron fist. Unfortunately, that has meant not giving to the church as I would really like. Well, this past Tuesday, at the weekly healing service I had one dollar left to my name... do you know how scary that is? But, as I was sitting in the service I felt God impressing on me to "give all I have"- meaning, to trust Him enough to give Him that last dollar. For some reason, when it came time for the offering, I didn't find this hard in the least- I guess I'm growing in my trusting, huh? Anyway- lesson here... if we give God all we have, He WILL provide for our needs. Within a short time after the service, one friend had handed me some money and given me a bag of food, and another friend had bought me lunch. Whoa... Ok, I get it Lord! Yesterday, DD called and offered to take me grocery shopping. Do you know what it feels like to suddenly have food, when the pantry shelves were basically empty? I get overwhelmed when I think about God's grace and provision. He really IS an awesome God!

2. The song Days of Elijah is probably my favorite song of all time. We sang it Tuesday at the Healing service and WOW was the presence of God ever among us- it was palpable!! I find such hope and comfort in the coming of our Lord. I pray daily for His return, an wait with joyful anticipation His presence among us! What a wonderful day that will be!!

Watch more Dailymotion videos on AOL Video

3. Yesterday was a seriously rainy day. I know I'm one of the few, but I love rain. I find it beautiful and peaceful. When it's not a cold, icy rain- there is nothing I love more than to take a walk and feel the healing gentleness of God's love washing over me.

4. I've been doing a lot of daydreaming this week about what could be-- making some plans (at least in my head) and trying to figure out a way to make those dreams happen. I love daydreaming- it's provides such hope. There is a saying I remember back from my childhood days... "Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, life is a broken winged bird that cannot fly." Yah, so I think I've forgotten how to dream... thanks to God for putting those dreams back in my head, and to Jan for reminding me that it's ok to dream!

5. And, last but not least- and on a much more shallow note LOL... I love hummus (extra garlic, please)!!! Yesterday when DD took me grocery shopping, I got a big tub of it... yes, it's gone already! So, a little self indulgence never hurt- God does want us to be happy, and if that comes from time to time in a tub of hummus, I think He'd be ok with that!

Happy Friday everyone... enjoy your weekend!

For Today...

Outside my window... bright, bright sunshine- puddles everywhere from a brief, recent thunderstorm, with more on the way later today... about 70 degrees


I am thinking... how odd it is that I actually LIKE the storms- they used to terrify me, but now I almost welcome them (not the bad ones, mind you- heavy wind and violent lightening, I can do without!)


I am thankful for... a wonderful guy who brought me homemade rhubarb pie on his way to work this morning


From the kitchen... think I may try making this sometime this week- actually have everything in the house for it, and it looks SO good


I am wearing... khaki shorts, purple shirt, barefoot


I am reading... all my old cookbooks (and there are many... many... many)


I am hoping... that someone-anyone, will respond to my resume- unemployment really STINKS


I am creating... a dream- a plan-- to be who God wants me to be


I am praying... that God shows me how to put the dream-plan in motion (and provides the finances to do so)


Around the house... the garden is in desperate need of weeding- it's embarrassing, trying to clean the back porch- (scrub down the walls, hang curtains (to block view of annoying neighbor), wash blankets on day bed (used over the winter as the comfy home of my adorable little mice- I do like mice, yes, I'm being serious- I just don't want to share a bed with them)...)


One of my favorite things... dreaming about what could be- doing a lot of that lately


A few plans for the rest of the week... not much in the way of errands, but see "around the house" for the other stuff


Here is a picture thought I am sharing with you

this is (was) some of the lettuce growing in my garden...

before the rabbits had a really great dinner....

oh well, they need to eat too!

Then Sings My Soul Saturday

My song choice this week comes from my sweet baby kitty Precious going to Heaven this past Wednesday... (see more about it in yesterday's post) Lord, it hurts SO much!! My heart is just broken in a thousand pieces. Lord, please give me strength and peace!!

Homesick by Mercy Me

You're in a better place, I've heard a thousand times
And at least a thousand times I've rejoiced for you
But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry
Is how long must I wait to be with you

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

Help me Lord cause I don't understand your ways
The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know
But, even if you showed me, the hurt would be the same
Cause I'm still here so far away from home

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

In Christ, there are no goodbye
And in Christ, there is no end
So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have
To see you again
To see you again

And I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now

Friday Fill-in's

...and here we go...

1. I grew up thinking that the world was a good and happy and safe place (well, except for my own home- but wont go into that now). Yah, ok, so boy was I wrong.... I guess we wake up as adults, huh? Sometimes I wish I could go back to that place of "ignorance" and just trust again, don't you?

2. Transfiguration's (http://transfigurations.blogspot.com) was the last website I was at before coming here. It's an Episcopal "based" website, that keeps me up to date on the happenings in the EC- the good, the bad and the ugly. I'm not all to happy with the state of the national EC right now, and am encouraged by (and am supporting) the many churches and dioceses that are choosing to split from the national church. Maybe the national church will get the hint, but I doubt it. Great website, if you're into all of that!

3. Why don't you (all of you who are reading this... yes, YOU) leave a comment (friendly please), telling me something about yourself? I know people are reading this... I'd just like to know who!!!

4. A hot bath and a glass of wine, helps me relax. That's on tap for tonight, well, minus the wine because I can't afford it right now... may even go for the candle light tonight too. Hmmm, it is night time yet?

5. Thanks for the love. The love I speak of is the love I've received for the last 13 years from my sweet baby kitty, Precious. This has been a tough week for me... on Wednesday, my baby went to Heaven. As many times as I've been through the loss of a pet, it's always agony and never ever gets easier. With no "real kids", my "pets" really become my babies. The pain of the loss is equal to, or greater than that of the loss of a human. (Trust me, I've experienced more human loss than any person should... more on that another time.) My Precious (aka, "Itty Bitty Pretty Precious Kitty"), was the sweetest little creature I could have ever imagined. She had a temper, yes-- but when she was loving, oh my gosh, she was the most cuddly little calico ball of fur you could ever imagine. My favorite way of being woken in the morning, which I miss SO much, is with her sitting on my chest and lightly hitting me in the face with her paw... how could I not wake up smiling! Anyway... thanks for the love, Precious... I miss you baby, and I'll always love you!

6. Swearing is very off-putting. I guess this is one of my pet peeves. First of all- taking the Lord's name in vain, is just wrong. If you're going to use my Lord's name in a negative way, then you're not going to be spending any time around me. Ok and while I'm on the "soap box", will someone please explain to me why some people seem to use the "f" word, seemingly in every sentence- sometimes every other word.... bleech... why????

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to taking a hot bath, and curling up in bed with a good book, tomorrow my plans include yard work (what else?) and Sunday, I want to spend at least part of the day with David (aka DD)!

The Simple Woman's Daybook

For Today...

Outside my window... an absolutely beautiful day- highs in the 70's, bright sunshine-- perfect!

I am thankful for... my wonderful Women of Prayer friends- no longer really a prayer group (wish we still were), but the bond we formed during our time together will never end- Love you ladies a lot!

From the kitchen... whatever DD brings me this week

I am wearing... t-shirt and Capri's

I am reading... a cookbook with crock-pot recipes- no food, but still love to read recipes... I know that makes no sense- but its one of my favorite things to do

I am creating... a growing garden, IF the pesky critters would stop eating it

I am praying... for the Tinkler family. They're friends from my old church (and even though I no longer attend there, I still have close bonds with the members)... anyway- this morning their son/brother was charged with 2ND degree murder in the death of his girlfriends three year old daughter. While I in no way condone the actions of this man, my heart absolutely breaks for his family. They're beyond devastated. This story is just breaking my heart today- actually making me nauseous. Only God really knows the truth about what happened to this child- it's not for us to judge or condemn... we're called to pray- and that is exactly what I am doing. God please comfort this family- be with them and hold them in Your mighty arms.

Around the house... so much to do- so little energy to do it

One of my favorite things... a long hot bath, with candle light- on the agenda for tonight

A few plans for the rest of the week... healing service tomorrow, spending time with DD... not much else- I soooooooooo need a life

Here is a picture thought I am sharing with you...

- Christ the King Chapel... one of my favorite places

(thanks to Jan for this picture)

Then Sings My Soul Saturday

I know I usually post songs that are serious and Holy, and that's all well and good and important, I know-- but this week has been tough and I've really just needed something to make me laugh. God wants us to laugh too! A few weeks ago, when preaching about the importance of loving our neighbor, Fr Nigel shared this . It had everyone just about falling over laughing- but he made his point too. This makes me laugh each and every time I hear it. Hope it will make you laugh too. Enjoy!!!

Friday Fill-Ins

And...here we go!

1. I love being home. I'm such a home-body... seriously, Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz, has it right... "there's no place like home, there's no place like home..." Where else can you totally be "who you are" without people judging you by your looks, actions, words...???

2. My favorite thing for dinner lately has been a big juicy orange. I don't usually think of oranges being really good at this time of year, but these are fantastic. Odd... I hated oranges (orange anything) when I was little (unless it was sweetened with a gallon of sugar)- now I just cant seem to get enough of them.

3. When I go to David's house, all I hear is bark! bark! bark! (With six LARGE German Shepherds, it makes an impression!! LOL)

4. A nice long walk is my favorite thing to do at CTK. With 700 acres to explore, there's always something new to discover, especially at this time of year... new life springing up everywhere! (The pic is taken by my friend Jan when we spent the day at CTK a few weeks ago... this is a Honeysuckle enclosed path leading to the convent... it was SO beautiful! )

5. I could sure use some good news. It's been a tough week... I just need a break!

6. When all is said and done, Christ is Lord.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to climbing in bed with a nice juicy orange, a big bottle of lemonade and a good book, tomorrow my plans include sleeping late and then some weeding in the garden and Sunday, I want to (have planned for a while to) make a really nice dinner for the Ronald McDonald House in Albany with my friends- so-so-so looking forward to this!

Wordless Wednesday

"Letting Go"

This is one of my paintings... it's taken from a photo that was taken six years ago at my Mom's burial. It's a picture of a butterfly balloon, which was symbolic to me of "letting go"... letting her fly free-- free from the pain that she'd been in for the eight years she'd suffered from that horrible Alzheimer's disease-- free from the broken hip, heart problems, a stroke... etc that had consumed the last eight months of her life.... free to fly with her wonderful God!! I miss you, Mom!!!

Something to share...

Yah, ok so today is "one of those days". I think I should have unplugged my phone (oh wait, I did- just not for long enough), and NOT checked email... (but well, I did...) and just stayed in my cozy bed with furry, purring heating pads all day. But no, instead, I spent my day trying to finalize the details of the Ronald McDonald House dinner for Sunday- the plans of which on paper look great, but seem to be going haywire before my eyes-- UGH. But even worse, I spent a good portion of my day trying to deal with my psycho (I'm SO not kidding) ex-boss who is making all sorts of "threatening" comments in emails. Today she is having a fit because she'd asked for the keys to the office, and is saying that I'll need to pay for the locks to be changed, AND if anything is ever missing from the office... well, you know... The wild thing is (and I thank God for a moment of sanity two weeks ago) that I was smart enough to send her precious keys through CERTIFIED mail on 5/21.... hmmm!! Checked with the post office and geee... they attempted delivery LAST WEEK- she's just choosing not to go sign for them. Oh well.... guess the ball's in her court now, huh? Anyway-- somehow I thought that quitting a job would be easier than this??? Ok, well thanks for letting me vent.

Had actually hoped on doing some "real" writing today, but my mood is pretty much, ah... well you know. So, instead of my writing, I'll just share something that Fr Nigel read a couple weeks ago in church. It really spoke to me... really woke me up. I think it was a large part (the other part being the psycho boss) of the reason I chose to quit my job. Hope you all enjoy this and it inspires you as much as it did me! I'm off now to climb in a hot bath, pour a big glass of lemonade (Lordy, I wish I had some wine right now!), and try to find something chocolate- weird combination, I know... but I'm menopausal, I'm allowed. After that I'll be checking in on my bloggy friends! :-) Have a good night, everyone!

In a Pit With a Lion on a Snowy Day

by Mark Batterson

Quit living as if the purpose of life is to arrive safely at death. Grab life by the mane. Set God-sized goals. Pursue God-ordained passions. Go after a dream that is destined to fail without divine intervention. Keep asking questions. Keep making mistakes. Keep seeking God. Stop pointing out problems and become part of the solution. Stop repeating the past and start creating the future. Stop playing it safe and start taking risks.

Accumulate experiences. Consider the lilies. Enjoy the journey. Find every excuse you can to celebrate everything you can. Live like today is the first day and the last day of your life. Don't let what's wrong with you keep you from worshipping what's right with God. Burn sinful bridges. Blaze new trails. Criticize by creating. Worry less about what people think, and more about what God thinks. Don't try to be who you're not. Be yourself. Laugh at yourself. Quit holding out. Quit holding back. Quit running away.

Chase the lion.

The Simple Woman's Daybook

For Today... June 1, 2009

Outside my window... cloudy and breezy- likely some rain tonight

I am thankful for... the big, juicy oranges that DD dropped off to me this morning on his way to work

From the kitchen... nothing from my kitchen (no income, no food, no cooking), but on Sunday will be joining with some friends to make a dinner for Ronald McDonald House... baked ham, sweet potato fries, homemade macaroni and cheese, green beans, rolls, freshly baked cookies and iced tea

I am wearing... my jammies

I am reading... need to start reading my next chapter for my OSL class, but just remembered that I loaned my book to Diane... uhhh, Diane??

I am hoping... to find a GOOD job (without a psycho boss)... SOON!

I am creating... not much... never got to the watercolor painting I was thinking about last week... maybe this week

I am praying... for travel mercies for Fr Nigel as he travels home from England

Around the house... everything I didn't get to last week because of the stomach/intestinal/migraine thing that wouldn't die

One of my favorite things... a kitty on my lap- so content... I need to learn this from her

A few plans for the rest of the week... looking for a job (again, one WITHOUT a psycho boss), preparing for the RMH meal on Sunday, maybe getting together with my friend Lisa-- (Lisa, you reading this??) and as always- spending time with my wonderful and loving God!

Here is a picture thought I am sharing with you

"new life"